roland@equalpartners.ca
http://EqualPartners.ca/

Equal Partners
by Roland Ezri

Equal Partners by Roland Ezri

Equal Partners

By Roland Ezri

"Women are the backbone of all societies. They do a substantial part of the work, and play a major role in raising the future generation yet they are largely powerless. The decisions that count are made by men and foisted upon women."

Writings by Roland Ezri

Jokes

Jokes – I. Heaven and Hell

Lester has always been a good man; therefore, when he died,
he went to heaven. The first few months were, well, heavenly.
Heaven lived up to its reputation as being a place of great
beauty, a place where a man can finally experience eternal peace.
In time, however, Lester started to get bored. There was nothing
to do. Perhaps he could visit old friends who had predeceased
him?

He remembered one of them, Martin. The way Martin has lived
his life, surely he was in hell. He went to the administrator to
check. Martin was indeed in hell and, yes, he could visit him.

On the stated day, one of the fallen angels came to take
him. They went through a large number of dark corridors, and
eventually emerged into a huge place. It was filled with people
talking, singing, and laughing. It was saturated with smoke;
there were bottles of liquor everywhere; and there were a large
number of gorgeous women, with very little on them.

The angel took him to Martin. After the small talk and the
hugging, Lester asked the obvious question: “This is hell with
liquor everywhere and such beautiful women?”

“My friend,” replied Martin, “this is indeed hell. Here the
bottles have holes and the women don’t!”

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Jokes – II. Miscellaneous Jokes (1 of 2)

In the old Soviet Union, a woman went to buy a refrigerator.
After the transaction was completed, she asked for the delivery
date and was given a date ten years down the road. “Will that be
in the morning or the afternoon?” she inquired.

“What difference does it make?” asked the bemused salesman.

“Well, I am expecting the plumber in the afternoon,” replied
the woman.

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Jokes – III. Miscellaneous Jokes (2 of 2)

Moses was taking an early morning walk in the woods.  Coming
from the opposite direction was Bush doing the same thing.  When
they meet Bush tell Moses: “Great morning, Moses.  We’ve really
been lucky with the weather so far.”  Moses goes by without
saying a word.  A few days later they meet once more.  Bush tries
again to engage Moses in small talk.  “We’re due for an early
spring, no doubt about that.”  Moses totally ignores him and
carries on with his walk.  The third time this happen, Bush stops
Moses and asks him:  “Why are you snubbing me Moses?  Did I ever
do anything to you?”

“I didn’t mean to offend you, Mr. President.  It’s just that
the last time I talked to a bush, I got stuck in the desert for
40 years!”

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Jokes – IV. True Funny Stories

A woman was returning to England from Lourdes, France. At
custom, the officer asked her to open her luggage. There he
found a bottle filled with a colorless liquid. “What’s in this
bottle, ma’am?”

“It’s holy water from Lourdes for my auntie,” replied the
woman.

But the custom officer was suspicious. “Sorry, but I’ll
have to open it and check the content.”

“That will upset my auntie to no end. She wants the water
just as it came out of the holy spring,” said the woman.

But the officer would not relent. He opened the bottle,
pored a bit in a glass and tasted it. “It’s rum, ma’am,” he
exclaimed.

“Rum?” shouted the woman. “Lord be praised. A miracle.”

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Jokes – V. Here And There (1 of 2)

Proctologists were up in arms. Their liability insurance
had increased by 50%. They complained that they were getting a
bum rap!

*  *  *

This man left a simple will:

“Being of sound mind, I spent it all.”

*  *  *

Why did Moses spent 40 years in the desert?

Even then men were reluctant to ask for directions.

*  *  *

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Jokes – VI. Here And There (2 of 2)

On a bright Saturday morning, Bea the bee went out to her
favorite garden to gather nectar. As luck would have it, the
garden was used for an outdoor wedding. Bea therefore made a bee
line to the sweet table and gorged herself.

As she was leaving, she overheard the caterer saying that
next week there would be an outdoor Bar-Mitzvah in the same
garden.

On the way back, Bea met her best friend, Bess the bee. She
told her what happened, and they both decided to attend the Bar-
Mitzvah.

On the appointed day, Bea to her surprise noted that Bess
had a yarmulke (skullcap worn during Jewish religious ceremonies)
on her head.

“Why on earth do you have a yarmulke on your head?” Bea
inquired.

“You told me it’s a Bar-Mitzvah,” replied Bess.

“So what, you’re not even Jewish,” countered Bea.

“Well, I didn’t want them to think that I am a WASP,”
replied Bess.

*  *  *

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Jokes – VII. Accountants Jokes (1 of 3)

An accountant is a professional who solves a problem you
didn’t know you had in a way you don’t understand.

*  *  *

How does a tax accountant ensures his immortality?

By having a loophole named after him.

*  *  *

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Jokes – VIII. Accountants Jokes (2 of 3)

As they watch their young son playing, the wife gently tells
her husband:

“He is such a sensitive child. Let’s wait until he’s older
before we tell him you’re an accountant.”

*  *  *

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Jokes – IX. Accountants Jokes (3 of 3)

Employee: The auditors have just left, sir.

Owner: Did they check the books?

Employee: They practically took them apart.

Owner: What did they say?

Employee: They want 10% to keep quiet.

* * *

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Jokes – X. A Man Walks Into A Bar … (1 of 2)

A neutron walks into a bar and order a beer. The bartender
promptly serves him.

“How much will that be?” asks the neutron.

“For you,” replies the barman, “no charge.”

*  *  *

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Jokes – XI. A Man Walks Into A Bar … (2 of 2)

A man walks into a bar and with great difficulties sits
himself on the stool.

“One beer please,” he manages to say.

The barman politely informs him that from all appearances he
has had already plenty to drink and that he cannot be served at
this establishment.

Reluctantly the fellow climbs down off the stool and
staggers out the front door.

The same guy reenters the same bar through the SIDE door.
He asks for a drink, but is still turned down by the barman.
After a lot of cursing he exits the bar.

A few minutes later, he bursts in through the BACK door of
the same establishment.  The scene repeats itself with a
bartender who is getting increasingly angry and threatens to call
the police.

The guy carefully looks at the bartender and exclaims:
“MAN!  How many bars do you work at?!”

*  *  *

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