Equal Partners
by Roland Ezri

Equal Partners by Roland Ezri

Equal Partners

By Roland Ezri

"Women are the backbone of all societies. They do a substantial part of the work, and play a major role in raising the future generation yet they are largely powerless. The decisions that count are made by men and foisted upon women."

Writings by Roland Ezri

The Second Exodus – Canada – CCCXXXVII. Wedding Bells (5 of 8)

It was time for our relationship to move into a more serious phase.

I picked the Victoria Day (May 1966) week-end to propose.  I can still remember that day. A glorious spring day, a day made for lovers.  We walked hand in hand in Central Park until I found a secluded spot, and there I asked the age old question.  Norma`s concern right after she accepted was whether I felt I could eventually make a better living?  I assured her that I definitely had the potential.  To formalize the matter, I went back to her home and asked her father for his daughter’s hand in marriage.  He consented.

Early in June, I went back to New York for an informal engagement party in Norma’s home.  There I met her relatives:  uncles, aunts, and cousins.  To be sure this was not an Egyptian crowd; but while the vibrancy was lacking, there was no doubt that they were very happy for us and congratulated us again and again.

An engagement ring had been purchased, on my behalf, by one of Norma’s uncle who worked as a jeweler.  At a certain point, her uncle surreptitiously gave me the ring.  I called Norma in the bedroom and there, away from the crowd, I gave her the engagement ring.  We hugged, kissed, and promised each other to always stand side by side, and face the future together.

My beloved and I were officially betrothed!


*  *  *


The discussion regarding the wedding arrangements very nearly wrecked the whole thing.

Hugo insisted on an elaborate wedding.  I, on the other hand, hated any extravagant affair; I felt that the money could be put to better use if it was given to the young couple to help them get started.  I called this a dowry.  I was not aware that such a thing did not exist in North America.

Both Hugo and I became very stubborn about the matter.  Using a lot of diplomacy, Clara and Norma made sure that things did not get to the breaking point.

Upon my return to Montreal, I sought the advice of Foufou.  He squarely sided with my future father in law.  In essence, he said:  “This is after all his only daughter.  It certainly makes sense that he would want her wedding celebrated in style.”

Adding Foufou’s argument to the fact that Norma had told me that we would lose very little financially since in a Jewish wedding most of the gifts would be in cash, I decided to give in.

The way was open to set up a wedding date.  That date was to be October 15, 1966.

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